Though we humans need air, water and food to survive, we need connection with others just as much—even when we think we don’t or possibly more if we think we don’t. You have probably heard of the studies of babies dying without attention or people surviving because of a deep connection to someone.

A connection is something I’ve strived for through my relationships and through my teaching and other work I do. How connected are you?  I don’t mean through technology although it definitely plays its part—connecting us with others at a distance as well as daily check-ins.

I thought it might be helpful to have a list of some ways to increase our connection with others. It’s downloadable, so if you want to print it off and post it somewhere, please do.


Be present.

Look people in the eye.


Connect in person whenever possible.

Use their name—especially when it’s a new relationship.

If appropriate, a gentle touch on the arm.



Ask questions.

Share how you feel.

Be vulnerable and authentic.

Don’t try to fix things unless it’s requested.

Put away your phone whenever possible.

If someone pops into your head, reach out to them.

Spend quality time with those you care about.

This is not a finite list. We each need connection, yet it doesn’t always look the same for each of us. My son and I SnapChat daily and have for a couple of years as a way to touch base. It’s not the same as our face-to-face meetings, but a way to have daily contact.

I’d love to hear how you connect.  Why do you connect? How does it feel when you don’t connect?

Enjoy the day and keep connecting!